flip's gone. gone forever. i miss him. i'm sorry flip. now my heart hurts like hell. i dont know what to do. we went him for cremation. getting his death cert in a few days time. i still cant get over him. this feeling suck completely. crying like shit hoping he will come back. maybe things wouldnt be in this way had i came home earlier yest to see him. but i didnt. i came home and went straight to my room. didnt realise the time passed. had i return home straight after school then things wouldnt be like that. had i not be so stubborn to wait till everyone's leaving then i left then things wouldnt be like that. had i not feel so empty then maybe things wouldnt turn out this way. why do things have to happen like this? seeing him get weaker and weaker as time went by. gradually not able to stand properly on his feet. i'm so helpless. tried massaging and stuffs for him but he didnt get any better. i feel so guilty. so sad. so depress. so helpless. i rather take over his place. seriously. why do i have to keep see those around gradually leaving me? WHY! what did i do to offend you that you have to take my love ones away from me?! he only a rabbit. why do you want to let him suffer? he still so young. he's only 1yr 3 mth and 4 days old! you took away my mom, then rips and now flip. so what do you want now. who are you taking away next?

i miss flip so much. missed putting that cushion on him. missed bathing him. missed playing with him. missed bringing him out to walk. missed massaging for him. missed carrying him. missed chasing him around. missed everything about him.

we sent him for cremation. hopes he'll live better in another world. flip, i love you. forgive me, i'm sorry. sorry i cant bring you up to an older age. sorry that you cant enjoy with fei they all anymore. sorry for everything.

it's so pain inside.